blog home Divorce How a Friendly Divorce Gets You the Best Settlement

How a Friendly Divorce Gets You the Best Settlement

By Nottage and Ward on March 23, 2012

There are always stories of heated courtroom battles between divorcing couples, each with their own aggressive attorney fighting for what their client wants. In such cases, the best settlement for both parties is not typically the goal. The goal is to take away something the other wants. This not only makes the divorce drag on and incurs hefty legal fees on both sides, but, by the end of it, both spouses will likely still be unhappy with the outcome. When a divorce is amicable, it can be much easier and quicker to come to a settlement that is agreeable to both parties and less likely to give rise to future problems. This means that, for a divorcing couple on bad terms with one another, it may be worth the extra effort, as difficult as it may be, to work together.

According to, the following eight guidelines can help you and your spouse amicably work towards an ideal settlement:

  1. Find a way to understand what happened in your marriage without succumbing to the blame game.
  2. Focus on the mistakes you may have made and how you could rectify them.
  3. Learn cooperative skills that will help maintain collaborative dialogue and facilitate shared decision making.
  4. Aim for a settlement agreement between generosity and fairness.
  5. Choose legal counsel that has experience in amicable settlements/mediation.
  6. Talk through your feelings of fear, shame and guilt, hurt, sadness, and anger with someone you trust.
  7. Remember that divorce is a gradual process.
  8. Always remember that there is life after divorce, and a friendly divorce can ensure that that life is not disrupted with recurring divorce issues.

At Nottage and Ward our Chicago collaborative law attorneys are committed to helping divorcing couples come to the best divorce settlement possible. A collaborative divorce is not always possible, but it is the ideal option. For a consultation, call us today at (312) 332-2915.

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