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Co-Parenting the Right Way after Divorce

By Nottage and Ward on August 20, 2012

After a divorce, many exes do not want to have anything to do with each other. This poses a serious problem if you have kids, however. Even if you can’t stand one another, you must put a concerted effort into establishing an amiable co-parenting relationship for the sake of your children. The Huffington Post offers the following tips for achieving a successful co-parenting relationship with your ex:

  1. Respect co-parent boundaries. Your ex’s parenting style is likely different than yours and may have some conflicting rules. There is no need to stress out over these conflicts (unless, of course, it is a major/serious one). Learn to accept these inconsistencies as they will ultimately give your children experience with different ways of doing things. Ultimately, be flexible.
  2. Maintain regular communication. Parenting cannot be one-sided. If you are committed to developing a successful co-parenting plan, you need to routinely check in with your ex, by phone, email, or in-person communication so that both of you always know what is going on with each other. This also allows for the proper planning of potential extra-curricular activities, vacations, and other time commitments.
  3. Encourage your child’s relationship with their parent. No matter what your feelings for your ex are, your child deserves a healthy relationship with both parents. Don’t put your ex down to your child and help facilitate a strong bond between them. Remind them about birthdays and encourage a positive relationship, especially if their co-parent is farther away. Even if you don’t want a close connection to your ex anymore, a strong parental bond is what will help your children grow up well-adjusted.
  4. Don’t alienate your in-laws. Grandparents are an important part of a child’s life and your in-laws’ love for their grandchildren do not stop after divorce. Do not punish your children, or your in-laws, for what went wrong in your marriage.

You are not just creating a new life for yourself after divorce, but for your children, and a positive co-parenting relationship is part of that. If you are a parent considering divorce in Illinois, the knowledgeable child custody lawyers in Chicago at Nottage & Ward can help you obtain a divorce settlement that creates a positive future for your children as well as yourself. Call us today for a consultation at (312) 332-2915.

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